|Friday, March 3rd, 2006|
I've just phoned Scottish Power to query a bill.
"You are being held in a queue. Your call will be dealt with shortly by an energy specialist."
I sincerely question the truth of this statement.
|Sunday, February 26th, 2006|
God bless Fox News. They really will take a crack at spinning ANYTHING.
|Thursday, January 5th, 2006|
It occurs to me after a couple of recent conversations that some of you reading this - the ones who don't read any of my comics stuff - didn't notice when I launched If Destroyed
a few months back, and shifted virtually all of my longer pieces over there. So I'm reminding you about it now.
If you're grumbling about not being able to have it on your LJ Friends page, then rejoice, because it's also available on Livejournal in syndicated form. (Although if you want me to see any comments, probably best to post them on the blog itself.)
|Monday, January 2nd, 2006|
SomethingAwful.com presents Myspace Fashion SWAT - a thorough dissection of twelve of the most ill-advised Myspace profile photos. This is one of the best things they've done in ages. The Jeffree Star one is brutal genius. And Chuck will bring joy to your heart.
|Wednesday, December 21st, 2005|
The full 139-page judgment in the Dover school board case. Crikey, this guy doesn't pull his punches.
"Any asserted secular purposes by the Board are a sham and are merely secondary to a religious objective. ... Defendants' previously referenced flagrant and insulting falsehoods to the Court provide sufficient and compelling evidence for us to deduce that any allegedly secular purposes that have been offered insupport of the ID Policy are equally insincere. ...
The citizens of the Dover area were poorly served by the members of the Board who voted for the ID Policy. It is ironic that several of these individuals, who so staunchly and proudly touted their religious convictions in public, would time and again lie to cover their tracks and disguise the real purpose behind the ID Policy. ... The breathtaking inanity of the Board's decision is evident when considered against the factual backdrop which has now been fully revealed through this trial."
I like this man.
Edited to add: It's worth mentioning, also, that Judge John E Jones III is about as far as you can get from an activist liberal judge. On the contrary, he's a moderate right-winger who once stood unsuccessfully for election as a Republican. (Given his obvious disdain for blurry reasoning, disingenuous arguments, and drivel masquerading as critical thought, one can only wonder what he makes of the Bush administration.)
|Tuesday, December 20th, 2005|
I don't normally post links to obvious meme-fodder, but I find this bizarrely compelling. Lindsay Lohen really does only have one facial expression
. She's got to be some sort of robot.
|Monday, November 21st, 2005|
Publicity stunt or sincere response to the death of Eddie Guerrero? The WWE announces the reintroduction of drug and steroid testing - and in a truly bizarre decision, posts a video of Vince breaking the news to the wrestlers. (The voice off camera asking questions is Kurt Angle, if you're wondering.)
If they're serious - and the last time they announced this, during the steroid trials, they DID actually stick with it for a while - then Chris Masters is especially screwed. Not only was he doing the bodybuilder gimmick, but he doesn't have any actual talent to fall back on...
|Friday, October 28th, 2005|
For any Doonesbury fans who might be interested, Garry Trudeau has posted next week's strips
- or rather, the strips which WOULD have appeared next week if only Harriet Miers hadn't withdrawn her nomination. Obviously, he can't really use them now, so it's going to be a week of repeats instead.
|Sunday, October 23rd, 2005|
The Arctic Monkeys' debut single enters the charts at number one. Never has the phrase "Don't believe the hype" been so insincerely deployed.
Seriously, is there something I'm missing here?
|Tuesday, October 11th, 2005|
|Friday, October 7th, 2005|
|Saturday, September 17th, 2005|
Magic The Gathering: Hurricane Katrina Edition. Inspired. (Even the rules. "All conservative creatures gain +2/+0 as long as Hillary Clinton is in play.")
|Friday, September 16th, 2005|
From the front page of today's Edinburgh Evening News:-
CONDOM PLAN FOR CITY TAXIS
Taxi drivers are set to hand out free condoms and sexual health advice leaflets to passengers in a move which has sparked fears about encouraging promiscuity among teenagers.
The new scheme is being brought to Edinburgh in a bid to reduce the number of unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.
However, the move has sparked fears it could encourage young people to have sex and leave drivers in difficult positions.
|Saturday, September 3rd, 2005|
From the Red Cross FAQ:-
Hurricane Katrina: Why is the Red Cross not in New Orleans?
Access to New Orleans is controlled by the National Guard and local authorities and while we are in constant contact with them, we simply cannot enter New Orleans against their orders.
The state Homeland Security Department had requested--and continues to request--that the American Red Cross not come back into New Orleans following the hurricane. Our presence would keep people from evacuating and encourage others to come into the city.
Except of course the people in New Orleans can't leave, so the purpose of refusing access to aid agencies is... what, exactly?
|Wednesday, August 31st, 2005|
Idea for a new makeover show: It's Your Funeral. Terminally ill people liase with the production team to ensure that their family and friends enjoy the funeral of a lifetime. Each show ends with the horrified and baffled mourners surrounded by network-funded dancing girls re-enacting a curiously sanitised and generally wholly inaccurate version of the loved one's life. Weekly segment: Pimp My Casket.
Do you think Fox would take it?
|Friday, August 26th, 2005|
|Sunday, August 21st, 2005|
|Saturday, August 20th, 2005|
[Looks at tonight's Film Festival tickets.] Three shows in one evening? What the fuck was I thinking...?!?
(And yes, I will be writing up all the Festival stuff. Boy, will I.)
|Friday, August 19th, 2005|
What always confused me about the Power Rangers was the name. They're not the Mighty Morphing Power Rangers, nor even the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers, but simply the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers.
Is "Morphin" even a word? How do we know it's supposed to be short for "Morphing"?
Maybe it's short for "Morphine" and they're trying to get it past the censors.
|Wednesday, August 17th, 2005|
Just so you know, I'll be doing lots of Edinburgh Festival stuff in due course. Give it a few days.
In the meantime, just out of curiosity, did any Americans see Johnny Vaughan's MY KIND OF TOWN, and how was it? It sounds suspiciously like an attempt to transport the superannuated Generic Chris Evans show to the USA, but then I suppose nobody's done it over there before.